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Maxine (single)

by Cockamamie Jamie

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1.
Maxine 04:57
MAXINE Verse 1: She was a blonde haired blue eyed Swede, smooth knees, in a Belle and Sebastian tee/ the first time I saw her I was working at a Cash-N-Dash, she appeared lookie hear at me through the plexiglass/ I perked up and I embellished a tad, then I leaned on my keyboard revealing my name tag/ she said, “Hello Jamie” all cutesy as if she knew me, and smiled as she admired my hideous work uni’/ I said, “Hi, welcome to Cash Cow” Where there’s always MOO cash for you, right now/ are we borrowing or sending today?", She said "it’s a little complicated" started looking the other way/ And shifting, I admit that my eyes were drifting, but not to the haunches, though, I would be remiss/ if I didn’t mention the fact that them shits were there, man it’s hip to be square, and oval shaped like a pear/ I am not fancy, she is classy and looks awesome , bitches ain’t shit, but she is blatantly bonkers/ and she might be slightly off her rocker, she reached into the bra, pulled a .22 from her knockers/ And laid it down flat, finger tapping on the trigger spine, “you wanna paint the town whatever colors we can find?”/ then she winked, and said her name was Maxine, she advised me play it smooth and we can split the whole thing/ and me being the dummy that I be I agreed, we can get away in my Jeep Grand Cherokee/ and we did, now I’m going all out kid, and I got mad love to give, you my nigga-ro// Verse 2: Good lord she's wearing my bears jacket, middle of December and it’s too cold to hack it/ without wrapping those shoulders up and grabbing some fro-yo, me never rolling dolo, uh-uh, no-no/ a young koala bear and I be staring at her steelo, I’m on some early onset Stockholm Syndrome shit/ this is it, did I mention I own a blimp? she grabbed on the steering wheel and pretended to crash it/ and with laughter she squawked and was like “gotcha bitch.” started pantomime rapping along with brother lynch/ I am sold, man this could never get old from her toes to that tiny little mole on ear lobe/ everybody knows I haven’t been naked in years, you can have my flabby chest and the scraggly beard// Chorus: Vroom! vroom! mashing doing about 40 eating frozen yogurt, just me and my shorty,/ she's riding shotgun, holding the shotgun, you fuck with the Argyle, she's dumping a hot one/ Lets go, lets do it, lets go for broke If you ever leave my sight I will slit your damn throat for real…so just chill/// Speaking: Maxine: Ok Jamie this is it, we’re going inside of there for realz, okay, So are you in it or not? Jamie: I think I’m in it. Maxine: No, there’s no more thinking, we’re done thinking, the thinking part of it’s over, we’re doing this for really doe. Are you in it to win it, or are you not? Jamie: I’m in it to win it, let’s go. Verse 3: Holy moly, crap, strapped, With a fully automatic uzi and a soda pop in my lap/ Me and my white boo, too-true splash down and dribble, Puddles of love, cuddle with fuzzy knuckles and little/ Itty-bitty-itsy pieces of miniature, Bullets, we packing massive heat up under our shirts/ We mosey into our local shopping complex, Step into that dummy like, “man, who’s next?!”/ You don’t wanna test me, I’ve got a mini mac 10, A 12-gauge pump, and I ain’t trying to make friends/ It’s a robbery, and your securities mocking me, Maxine and Jamie Lee, we be sleazy, and sloppily/ Hawking loogies, cocking weapons, hobnobbing with bullets, Yelling really scary in our Jerry Curl mullets/ Plastic bags, draped over the face from Vons, Guns muzzled with tape, and a package of tampons/ get your mack on she told me as I approached the teller, I cocked the shotgun she turned into Helen Keller, while Maxine was blasting the security guard, the bank manager went and flipped the alarm/ like, do that shit, do that shit, do it DO THAT SHIT, DO THAT SHIT, DO IT, I said, do that shit, do that shit, do it, DO THAT SHIT, DO THAT SHIT, DO IT///
2.

about

Artist: Cockamamie Jamie
Album: Survivor Series
DIGITAL RELEASE DATE: May 13, 2013
LIMITED RELEASE CD: June 3, 2013

Cockamamie Jamie sets off on his own with a wistful tale of young love, with a crazy ass bank robber. It doesn’t end well for the couple, as Bonnie & Clyde would tell you, but the love affair is certainly fun while it lasts. Full of unforgettable declarations like "Lets go, lets do it, lets go for broke/If you ever leave my sight I will slit your damn throat", it's hard not to fall for "Maxine". Cockamamie Jamie's solo debut is due out Summer 2013. - Cristobal Carrilo (Spanspekfestival.com)

credits

released March 11, 2013

written by: jamie nelson
produced by: juan duarte
trombone by: gary anderson
artwork by: linda reneau

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about

Cockamamie Jamie Fresno, California

Cockamamie Jamie is a 64 year old white man, ripping shit for the Lord.

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